My Honest Take on Massage Therapy for Fussy Babies

I'll never forget the day our pediatrician mentioned that one of our babies wasn't lifting their head by three months. She didn't make a big deal out of it, but suggested we try some massage to help them relax and develop their muscles. The other baby was doing great, lifting their head and holding it steady, so we decided to book a course of massage sessions for both of them.

We were lucky to get a referral for 10 sessions of general massage, and I was relieved to avoid the two-month waitlist at the clinic. I figured that developmental milestones were more important than waiting for a free massage, so I found a private massage therapist and booked sessions for both babies at the same time.

Cost of general massage

Each session cost 900 rubles and included 30 minutes of massage and age-appropriate exercises. The massage took place at home, which was super convenient because after the massage, the babies were exhausted and fell asleep right away. It's way easier to put them down for a nap at home than to transport them from the salon or clinic, bouncing around in the car or stroller.

To get started with the massage, I needed a few basic things:

any massage oil (I chose the Tick Tak massage oil from Magnet Cosmetics, which was on sale for 199 rubles) a blanket or sheet a hard surface (I used the kitchen table) a waterproof changing pad (mine was 70x90 cm, with a soft cotton side and a waterproof membrane) a rattle – just in case the baby got upset

What I asked the massage therapist The only thing I mentioned to the therapist was that one baby wasn't lifting their head. She said that this massage course would be just what they needed. During the massage, we discovered that the other baby had a bit of a mobility issue with one of their joints. The therapist said that was normal and that the massage would help improve it.

She also noticed that both babies were holding their hands in fists – that's totally normal at this age, and the massage would help them develop their palmar grasp.

Our massage therapist was super knowledgeable and explained everything she was doing. I was amazed by how much massage could accomplish – it helped relax the babies' muscles, corrected their posture, and even helped them lift their heads.

Both babies were super sensitive around their necks. When the therapist worked on that area, they would both react strongly – one would cry, and the other would scream and turn bright red.

How the massage works

The massage always started with the baby's feet. They'd lie on their back, and the therapist would apply some oil and start massaging their feet and toes. The movements were all gentle, and the baby would just lie there, looking content.

Next up was the belly. If I'm not mistaken, the circular motions around the belly button are meant to help prevent umbilical hernias. One of our babies had one, so this exercise was especially relevant.

Then it was time for the arms. The movements were pretty intense here too, and our babies were getting a bit overwhelmed by the sensation. They were fussing and whining, and the massager was doing her best to soothe them with all the circular motions and pinching.

After that, the massager would flip the baby over, but not quite all the way. She'd take their leg and gently flip them onto their side, encouraging them to relax their upper body. With our babies, this didn't quite work, so she'd end up doing it for them.

The neck was the worst part for both of our babies. They were really unhappy when the massager started working on their necks, with all the pinching and stretching. The worst part was when she'd grab their skin with both hands and start stretching it out to the sides, like she was ironing out their muscles. It was clear that this was the reason why our babies weren't turning their heads as much. During feeding, I'd have to turn them onto their side like a little burrito, while the other baby could just lie on their back with one head turned towards the breast.

After the massage, the massager would pick up the baby and gently lower their head down, relaxing their entire body. Then she'd hand them over to me to put them down for a nap.

How the babies handled the massage

Massage is a bit of a stress for babies, since they all have some level of tension. So, something's always going to hurt or be uncomfortable. For us, it was the neck, legs, and arms. One baby just cried a bit, while the other one went full-on ballistic, turning bright red.

When the massager would finish up with the arms/legs/neck and start doing some gentle movements, our babies would calm down and pretty much pass out from exhaustion. It was like they'd given up and accepted their fate.

After the massage, our babies would always sleep for two hours, and if they got a feed during that time, they'd sleep for three. Sometimes they'd even fall asleep during the feed. The massager said it was like a trip to the gym for adults - they're exhausted, so it's no surprise they react like that.

One time, our baby slept for five hours after the massage, and I was amazed. But I didn't wake them up, since I'm on demand feeding.

The effect

After just two sessions, our little guy who had been struggling to move his joints started to move around so much better. The specialist noticed that both legs were moving to the sides equally well. With lifting his head, he didn't have any issues to begin with, but after the session, he started holding it straight up like a little monkey – very confidently.

I was really impressed with the second little guy who had been having trouble turning his head. He started to lift it up in a vertical position, which was a great sign. These little ones tend to get a burst of energy and then suddenly drop their head back or hit it forward – it's quite a sight! Okay, so he might accidentally whack me in the chest or chin, but the fact that he's started doing this is a great sign that his neck muscles are slowly relaxing from the tension.

What's more, this little guy started feeding himself lying on his back and only needed to turn his head. We used to have to turn him completely around to get him to the breast. And voila! Now he can do it from any position.

After 3-4 sessions, we started to see the plasticity that allowed our little ones to cross their knees and elbows. They became more flexible and relaxed, rather than stiff and rigid.

After 5-6 sessions, our little guy who had been holding his head up started to do it even better and higher. He began to lift his chest off the surface, using his forearms and wrists to support himself. It was like he'd moved on to a whole new level. The little guy who hadn't been able to hold his head up at all started to lift it, albeit briefly. It was clear that it was hard for him, but he was trying his best. So, he just lay there, face down on the mat, and cried...I asked the specialist why he wasn't using his arms to lift his head, and she said that first, he needed to learn to lift his head on his own. Using his forearms was the next step.

The plasticity was getting better and better. One of our little ones was already starting to bring his elbow and knee together on one side, while the other side still had a bit of a gap.

After 10 sessions, our little guy who hadn't been able to hold his head up started to do it confidently. He began to lift himself up using his forearms even more confidently.The little guy who hadn't had any issues with lifting his head started to support himself very well using his forearms. Differences between paid and free massage

I've gotta say, after paying for a massage, I got a call from the clinic inviting me to free sessions. And let me tell you, it's like night and day between free and paid massage! The massage therapist at the clinic was basically just going through the motions, lightly stroking the babies and stopping whenever they cried.

The massage technique itself was basically non-existent. She'd move from hands to legs, to stomach, and just keep going in circles. She never even tried to motivate them to roll over, like the paid therapist did. Instead, she'd awkwardly pick them up and lay them down, like she was just trying to waste the 25-30 minutes we had for the session.

We did talk about everything, and it was fine, but the trips to the clinic with two babies and the discomfort of waiting for both sessions to be over also play a role. The cost of these trips is comparable to what I paid the paid massage therapist, but in one case, we had to go home, and in the other, the babies fell asleep in their cribs right after the massage.

Takeaway

After taking the course, I'd highly recommend overall health maintenance massage. It allows the baby to significantly improve their development without harming their health. However, it's crucial to find a good specialist who's serious about their work, not just someone who'll lightly stroke their hands and feet. In the future, I'll follow the paid therapist's advice and do another course in six months to see the progress.