Two Years of Heartache: Why I Kicked My Kid Out of This Daycare

I had been dreaming of this daycare as I strolled around the house where it's located with my little one. I started hearing about it when my kid was just over a year old. Our daycare administrator was super helpful and gave me a list of documents I needed to enroll my kid, which included a medical checkup with the doctors on the list and buying a medical record from a bookstore beforehand. They also invited us to a tour.

The daycare rooms are small, but they look bigger thanks to the white color used to create a sense of space. As we walked in, I was hit with the smell of food and dirty diapers - it was like stepping back into my own childhood memories of attending a municipal daycare. Fast forward to when my kid was 1 year and 7 months old. We enrolled them in the daycare on May 14, 2021, and left the daycare on May 14, 2023 - exactly 2 years later.

1. The daycare has video surveillance - but you can only monitor your kid in their group, and that's only in one room. You won't be able to keep an eye on them during outdoor activities, in the changing room, or the bathroom. However, most of the time, the kids are in their groups, and you get access right away.

2. Cleanliness - I have to say, the cameras caught the caregivers cleaning during quiet time quite often. They disinfect the toys and clean the room once a week. The sinks and toilets were clean when I visited. There were labeled containers for each child's belongings on the shelves. But, it doesn't stop the kids from bringing in dirty shoes from outside and tracking them into the group. I walked down the hallway in my white socks and ended up with black ones...

3. Activities

math language development reading music class nature arts and crafts Occupational and Behavioral Education (I assume this is the correct term) fitness storytelling therapy English language

I observed all these activities through the camera. The English class wasn't always consistent, though - they had a hard time finding a replacement teacher. During the summer, English wasn't offered. Honestly, my son didn't need any of these activities at 2 or 3 years old. Most of the neighbors' kids didn't need them either. The caregivers would make a craft project and proudly present it to the parents. However, I did see a couple of kids in the younger group who were really interested in learning and soaking up the knowledge.

4. Chat with the caregiver - you can make individual requests, like asking them to dress or undress your child, or change their bedding - and they usually respond within 90% of the time.

5. Getting the child dressed and undressed - this is my favorite part. I drop off the kid, and when I come back, they're already dressed. I've never seen a daycare do this before. The worst daycare I've ever been to didn't even offer this service.

6. Weekly Reports - at the end of the week, the caregiver is either over the moon or completely unimpressed, depending on their mood. They'll send you a report of what they've learned with the kid that week, what new things they've discovered. There'll be plenty of photos, and sometimes even a video with music. The photos will show the kids having the time of their lives, and you'll melt at how perfect everything seems at this daycare. I had a caregiver who barely sent any reports for three months because she only started working there during the summer.

7. Interacting with the owner - when I mentioned that my kid got stuck on the stairs leading down to the playground, the next day the gaps were filled in. (The construction wasn't exactly kid-friendly).

8. Medical Check-Ups - it was good that they were done daily, from 9 to 11 am, where they'd assess the kids' health and call if anything wasn't right. I wish they'd done it when the kids first arrived at the daycare.

9. Potty Training - in our group, everyone successfully transitioned from diapers to the potty. But that's not my kid's story... although it worked for some of the others.

10. Air Purifiers - the daycare has air purifiers in the group, which I thought would be a lifesaver for my kid's health. But, surprisingly, it didn't make a difference - everyone still gets sick at the same rate.

11. Injury Reports - if my kid got a scrape or fell, they'd inform me at the end of the day and even treat minor cuts.

Some reports were like that:

My son was running around the playground and fell into the fence right next to his eye. Sounds crazy, but at least his eye is okay.

He got knocked down by a 5-year-old girl from the play structure with the slides. I have no idea how high she was... - I mean, who's not watching this kid who's notorious for her outbursts?

MINUSES:

1. Working hours - 8:30-18:30. When I brought it up at a meeting that the working hours could be made like in the municipal kindergarten, everyone burst out laughing. Apparently, 'we have a special clientele here', they told me. Nobody needs an earlier schedule... if you need to drop off your kid earlier or later, you can use the paid service:

early drop-off before 8:30 - 100 rubles. They had trouble telling me the exact time when I asked each time.

late pick-up after 19:00 - 250 rubles for 30 minutes extra.

By the way, when I really needed to bring my kid in 30 minutes early, the lovely teacher got upset with my request as if it was free for me. (She warned me a week in advance that I needed to go to an exam). And when I arrived in the morning at the appointed time, the face was not exactly welcoming, since I was doing them a huge favor.

2. Monthly subscription - 22,000 rubles (no meals) - as of April 1, 2022.

With meals, it's 7,560 for 21 days + 22,000 = 29,560 rubles.

By that time, they had already cancelled the compensation for missed days due to illness. Even if it's a string of weekend days during the New Year's holidays - your kid doesn't go to school for 10 days, but you pay for those 10 days (that's how it was in 2021). And then there are the May holidays. Oh, and don't forget that the kindergarten has reduced pre-holiday days. All of this is just like in the municipal kindergarten.

3. Annual Fee - 5,000 rubles - you'll have to pay it, whether you like it or not - the membership fee is non-negotiable! So, you'll be paying it a month after signing the contract.

Besides the annual fee, you also get a branded gift:

2021 - Ashan pencils, Baby Club coloring book, and mosaic art by Baby Club.

2022 - A white and bright Baby Club t-shirt (the best color for a little boy - 'Wash, soak, don't be stingy with stain removers, and triple the dose!').

4. Food - 360 RUB per day = 7,560 for 21 days. I was warned that if I didn't show up to daycare, I'd have to pay for the food the next day. I got frustrated when I couldn't predict when my child would get sick, and they told me I had to give them a 30-minute or 1-hour notice before bringing my child in. I'm still not clear on why they want to take 360 RUB from me if they're going to bring the food anyway and prepare it in advance...

The food at Hryuchyovo is quite rare, but it's served five times a day... I couldn't bear to watch the kids poking at their food, so I didn't.

My child came home from daycare smelling like rotten, undercooked onions - how many times did I ask them to talk to the food supplier? Countless times. The response was always the same - 'We cook the onions according to our technological guidelines.' The smell was unbearable, and it even seeped into their clothes.

When it comes to the clothes... GREASE ON CLOTHES. I'm not saying it for sure, but I think they might be using plant-based oil here. I mean, I just can't explain why there was so much ruined clothing that, even after soaking in Fairy/Vinegar/boiling/hand-washing to get rid of this stain, it just wouldn't come out. No, we still wore the clothes, that's not the point. I could smell this oil smell even after multiple washes. And you know what, honestly, there aren't even stains like that in our local park, and when there are, they come out in the wash.

My kid came home from daycare starving. He ate and couldn't get enough. And at the time, I didn't realize that the food at daycare was actually pretty bad, I just thought he loved my cooking.

5. Quiet Time - My Worst Nightmare! Naptime starts at 12:30-1:00 PM, but they wake the kids up at 3:30 PM. I'm seriously baffled as to how they manage to put the kids down so quickly... falling asleep at 12:30, sleeping for 3 hours, and waking up at 3:30 PM, my kid was bursting with energy until bedtime, driving me crazy with his refusal to sleep.

6. The Caregivers

We've been unlucky with this from the start. For the summer, we had a young woman who came in to work part-time, since she was sending her two kids to their grandma. It was clear she was struggling to keep up. There were a lot of complaints from the other parents. I felt bad for her, I tried to be supportive. But oh boy, it was a mistake.

I'll never forget the time I caught my kids on camera waking up during quiet time. The caregiver had left the room, and my son was standing on his bed, looking adorable as always. He was on the top bunk, and I'll never forget that he was only 1.7 months old at the time. Another little boy was frantically trying to push him off, but my son was just standing there, fast asleep and completely clueless. It was a miracle he didn't fall off the bed!

But what really got my attention was the story of how this caregiver's negligence led to a trip to the emergency room:

My son developed a habit of putting things up his nose, and it was only when he was being supervised that he wouldn't try it. I had warned the caregiver to keep a close eye on him, especially since there were five kids in the group at the time. But, as you can imagine, she was new and didn't really know what she was doing. She left the kids unattended during naptime, and of course, my son found a way to get into trouble. He put a small toy up his nose, and when I came back, I was horrified to see that he had a brown discharge. I had to take him to the emergency room to get it removed, and it was a real scare. If that toy had gone any further up his nose, it could have been disastrous. Needless to say, I was relieved when the summer ended and the caregiver left. The director had promised to hire a new, experienced caregiver, and I was hopeful that things would get better. But, as we'll see, that was short-lived.

I have to admit, the daycare had a lot of staff turnover, and I often couldn't keep track of who was working with my kid. Sometimes, they'd poach staff from other locations, and they'd always seem so smug and uninterested. One of the teachers actually echoed my concerns - 'In our daycare, we don't have discipline issues because the kids listen on the first try, even the toddlers! Here, they're like wild animals running around.'

There was this one time when a 2-year-old girl was taken outside in the freezing cold without a diaper, and they let her play for 30 minutes before her mom showed up. At that point, she wasn't even potty-trained yet...

By the time we left the daycare, the staff had settled down a bit, but it still wasn't right. The phrase 'Daycare is like a second home' didn't feel true to me, especially after that initial period. It was a story about a teacher who stayed on for a year and was loved by everyone.

7. The daycare's policy is to raise the kids gently and with love, talking to them and accepting them, and containing their emotions. Sounds like a utopia, right? But for my kid, what they really needed was structure and discipline, or else they'd get into all sorts of trouble. The lack of boundaries was starting to take a toll on the staff's mental health.

I've seen my kid throw a tantrum because the caregiver refused to fetch him a toy for the third time. He was fuming, saying something like, 'You brought it for me twice, why not this time?' But the thing is, you shouldn't have brought it in the first place.

After two years at the Baby Club, it was clear my kid had lost his boundaries. But, they 'fixed' him at the municipal park where everyone's independent, and the caregivers can't really discipline them.

One of the downsides for me was the 8 times I had to take my kid to the nurse because of allergies and colds. I'd pick him up, and he'd be fine, just with a tick in his ear.

There was one time when I got a call to take my kid home because he had a bad cold. I brought him home, and when I looked at him, he was perfectly fine. It turned out the nurse had just been a bit too quick to call me.

9. Bedding - you bring your own pillow, blanket, and sheets! I asked the administrator, 'Do you have a mattress?' And she just burst out laughing.

You bring your own pillow and blanket, and you buy everything yourself. And then you have to take the sheets home every week, wash them, iron them, and bring them back. In the municipal park, they only wash the pajamas, but here you have to do it every week with the sheets too.

10. Lost items - I naively thought that with only a few kids in the group, losing things would be a rare occurrence. But my kid would often come back with someone else's clothes. It wasn't a big deal, we'd just swap back.

I have to say, the most frustrating thing for me was the constant disappearance of socks, in pairs. No matter how many I bought, I'd bring them in but never take them out. The chat group would be filled with questions like 'have you seen my socks?' but it was never resolved. Some of the socks had been worn only once... and they were the branded ones, mind you.

11. No compensation - if you got sick, even with a doctor's note? That's pretty impressive. You can still visit, but the money won't make up for it, it's just going towards the daycare costs.

12. Lack of a middle group - there's a group for 2-3 year olds, but then there's a mixed-age group with kids as old as 4-5. My 3-year-old was moved to that group with my consent, and it didn't end well. I'll share more about that later.

13. An open playground, near the road - yes, the playground is open and not enclosed. During a walk with the kids, other children can join in, usually with their moms who want their kids to socialize. I didn't see any kids escaping, but I did see them being caught. When the daycare isn't on a walk, the playground is accessible to the residents of the neighboring houses. It was on this playground that I got into an argument with another mom who let her daughter pee right there. 'What's the big deal, you're the one who's always so uptight' - she said with a straight face.

14. Spreading personal data (!!!) - this is what really got me and made me write this review. A friend of mine started a stint at the daycare and instead of learning about the work, she started gossiping and spreading personal info. When we met up, she told me everything she shouldn't have known.

Apparently, the staff signed a non-disclosure agreement but that didn't stop them from sharing the info. It's like they think they're above the law.

So, it's clear that the staff isn't taking their confidentiality agreement seriously.

comments:

Adjustment Period - for the first 5 days, you need to take it easy, gradually getting your little one used to it. This gentle adaptation method is a must. It costs 250 rubles per hour.

Maximum number of kids in a group - 13 kids. I thought this was a small number, especially since my kid's old group had 30 kids, but in reality, only half of them were actually attending.

You can claim a 50% refund for 28 days a year, but you need to submit a written application, as this is considered a planned absence (vacation) according to the contract.

They used to offer discounts on subscription plans - 3-6-9-12 months, depending on the plan, you could get a 5-10-15-20% discount. However, they abolished these discounts in 2022.

This is what my year-long subscription cost me.

Why did I call this daycare infamous? Have you seen it in the news?

According to Rima B., the mother of the affected child, on October 20, the caregiver at the Ufa 'Baby Club' on Jaliyl Kiyekbaev Street ignored her son's crying for an hour, then approached him and started dragging him around the room, despite his resistance, and finally pushed him. The woman's words are corroborated by the video recording from the daycare's camera.

As for the caregiver involved in the scandal, she was actually my son's teacher. I had given my consent for him to move to a mixed-age group because the daycare didn't have a middle group at the time.

I was surprised to learn that the educator had a law degree. She seemed to tolerate the kids and went about her duties, making sure to clean, vacuum, and fill out paperwork - you know, the usual stuff. When it was time for scheduled activities, she'd participate and record the kids' progress for the weekly report. I wouldn't say she was neglecting the kids, but she didn't exactly go out of her way to engage with them either.

What happens when a 3-year-old is moved to a group with 4.5-5 year-olds? I heard daily complaints from the educator about this very issue. She just didn't get that 3-year-olds have different abilities and needs compared to the older kids.

Every day, I'd hear her complaining that my child was playing during activities, didn't want to sing, or couldn't dress himself. She was especially frustrated that he wasn't doing math problems and wasn't completing his assignments... I realized we weren't on the same page, so I transferred him back to the younger group, where he could be with the other 3-year-olds.

Since the mixed-age group wasn't working out for my child, and the educator wasn't even involving him in activities (not even when she sent me weekly photos, my child was never in them), I decided to transfer him back to the younger group. It just so happened that our neighbor's child was also in this group, and they were both over 3 years old.

Later, I didn't receive a receipt for my payment, and the club owner called me to suggest that I take my child to their other location on the other side of town. Apparently, they wanted to recruit younger kids because my child was sticking out like a sore thumb in the older group, and they were already at capacity.

I've gotta say, my kid didn't start talking in daycare. Despite being there since 1.7 years, the socialization experience didn't help him. By 3 years and 2 months, he started attending speech therapy sessions at the Baby Club to get his speech going. We're still dealing with diapers and a potty, despite being promised a smile and a chance to be potty-trained. All those developmental activities didn't quite do the trick for us. It's not about the kid being slow, it's just that some kids take a little longer to get going...

My takeaway: After reflecting on it all, I wish we hadn't gotten stuck in the Baby Club for so long. The convenience of having it right at home was a major factor in me tolerating all the downsides.

What's worth noting is that enrolling my kid in daycare at 1.7 years did give me a bit of a break. Within a couple of weeks, he learned to walk alongside me, which was impossible before – he'd squirm around like a fish on a hot skillet! He also learned to listen to adults, which was a huge improvement from his previous tantrums, where he'd just do his own thing because he wanted it his way.

If I'm being honest, I'd only recommend enrolling in a Baby Club for a maximum of 6 months (or a year at the most) – just like some of the more savvy moms do. The kid gets potty-trained, starts talking, and then you're free to move on to a municipal daycare. At least there, you won't have to deal with diaper-related drama and complaints about kids wearing diapers. And if your kid does get upset, they can at least express themselves. Plus, being able to watch the cameras for the first year or so can be a lifesaver for anxious parents like me.

And to be honest, I considered sending my kid to this place for the summer when the municipal daycare was under renovation, since I had nowhere else to leave them.

For context, after trying out the Baby Club, I visited a bunch of private daycares and they just didn't compare. Same tiny spaces, same conditions, same program, same cribs, cameras... some of them even lacked outdoor areas for kids to run around. I had to circle the block for ages just to find parking, and some places smelled like, well, you know, when you walk in.

So I ended up enrolling my kid in the municipal daycare:

A big backyard. Independent kids with a bit of spunk, I guess. My son was a delicate flower, despite being considered a bit of a wild child in daycare. No coddling here. This really resonated with my son, I swear. In the municipal park, everyone's on their own. If you don't want to follow the rules, that's okay, but you'll be expected to respect the community. The educational program - we all bought workbooks with letters, numbers, and math problems. According to the recommended curriculum, the kids work on these books here. Since the Baby Club group didn't have workbooks, it's because the kids are 1-3 years old. Food. He eats it. My kid no longer reeks of garlic and there are no greasy, smelly stains on his clothes. And he doesn't mash his food to bits when he gets home. No more washing his bedding! I can confidently say my kid won't arrive at the park until 8:00 and no one will charge me for the cheaper meals here, which are half the price of what we paid at the Baby Club. No one tries to kick kids out for having a runny nose, because everyone here has a runny nose.

Maybe if we hadn't been 'encouraged' to leave the Baby Club, we could have stayed... but lately, I've been unhappy with my child's behavior, and the park's own childcare seems to have contributed to his detachment from me. (He's been there for two years, after all.)

Some people might disagree with me, saying it's the child's upbringing at home that shapes them, but here

There was a time when teachers were just too nice and lenient.

You know, those school days... where some teachers wouldn't even flinch if you whispered during class, while others would literally run around the room if you so much as made a peep: especially if it was a young teacher, from what I recall.

I want to thank Sadiq for the two years we spent together, but we parted ways on a sour note. And that whole thing with the personal data breach... it was just disgusting!

sorry for the delayed review, written two years too late