The Boredom Cure: My Adventures with Tabor

Hey there. I'll be honest, I'm not a fan of online dating. I mean, I don't really buy into all those romance TV show illusions or the idea of finding love online. But sometimes, curiosity gets the better of me.

I downloaded Tabor with the goal of chatting and having some fun conversations. So, I was there just for friendship and chatting - nothing more.

Registration is pretty straightforward, you can list your interests, specify your age preference, habits, and even write a bit about yourself. Too bad nobody really reads this stuff and just spews out generic responses.

Next, I upload some photos, and that's it - time to dive into the world of online dating.

The top things that drive me crazy about men's questions:

1) Where are you located? So, what's the point of asking that? Don't waste your time and money on a meetup? I'd rather not share my address with someone I've just met online, thanks. I'd rather be seen as paranoid, awkward, and annoying than compromise my safety. Who knows, a person's true nature might not reveal itself until the 8th or 10th meeting. And then what? I'd have to change my address and be more cautious about leaving the house? No thanks!

2) Give me your phone number, Viber, Telegram, or two or three SMS! What gives them the right to ask for my phone number? I once told one of these 'hurry-up' guys that it makes no difference whether we chat online or on the phone, since I have a recording device for voice messages. He got pretty aggressive about it. You see, knowing someone's phone number can reveal a lot of information. And if your new 'beau' gets upset that you didn't agree to sleep with them after the first date, they might just post your number on certain websites as revenge. And that's how you get a bad reputation for being promiscuous.

3) Let's meet up? - on the very first day of chatting. Come on, I'm not going to agree to meet someone I've only chatted with for two or three minutes! It's the same story as with point #2.

I know you can think I'm paranoid, but I have reasons for being cautious. Let me give you an example:

I had a neighbor, a girl around my age, who we didn't really know each other, but we lived in the same building.

She preferred not to waste time on online chats and would rather dive right into things. She was also registered on dating websites.

Well, it all ended with the police finding her body in the woods, brutally mutilated. And she was still only in her early twenties.

3) Are you married? Do you have kids? And that's despite me having all this information clearly listed in my profile - including my relationship status and preferences. Can't they just take the time to read it instead of asking me these questions?

I've gotta say, I'm really turned off by this kind of thing. Why do I have to give some random person a play-by-play of my personal life? We're talking about a conversation that might last 10 minutes, max. What's the point of knowing all that stuff? Does it make them sleep better at night to know I've been married eight times and have six kids from different dads? I mean, come on. That's just sarcasm. But I guess that's not a bad thing... yet.

When I first created my profile, I was getting messages left and right. I couldn't keep up! I ended up choosing to respond to some people, but not others. It seemed harmless enough.

...But then my interest started to wane. And it's all because men were constantly asking me for stuff! "Send me a Viber!" "Write to me on Telegram!" (Newsflash: I've never even had Telegram and don't plan on getting it). "Show me more pics!" "Don't be quiet!" "Tell me more!" It was like, hello, I'm a person with my own stuff going on, too. I don't have time to sit around chatting with you 24/7.And to make matters worse, they didn't even care that I was asking for nothing in return. No pics, no responses, no compliments. No pressure to be constantly available.

And what's with this weird habit of people demanding attention from others? It's just so... draining.

Ah, but I'll let you enjoy the chat logs. Tabore doesn't allow screenshots, but I managed to get around that system.

This guy was a real nuisance. I didn't respond to him because he just wasn't my type, and to be honest, I didn't feel like chatting with him either. Grammar-wise, he could use some work:

...I don't know about you, but I find it really annoying when people are just too clingy. Look, if someone's not interested in chatting with you, just leave them alone and find someone else to talk to! But no, some people just have to get all clingy and attached. It's just so... much.

Not everyone was like that, though. This guy was actually pretty normal:

...What a bold guy! And he wasn't afraid to share all the dirty details about himself, either. I mean, if I was a scammer or a serial killer, I'd be pretty proud of myself, too... But then he went and ruined it all with his "wants":

...I was laughing so hard at this guy's "original" greeting and all the subtle hints he was dropping. Like, dude, five+ levels of subtlety, please:

...And as for this next guy, I just don't get it. I mean, I can understand if someone wants to have a little fun, but this kind of open hostility towards me? No thanks:

But it's at this point that I start to feel like I'm being taken advantage of. If I don't want to chat or I'm just short on time, what's the big deal?:

So what? Don't get me wrong, I'm not expecting a response right away, but I do expect to be able to have a conversation without feeling like I'm being hounded.

And again, I'm being bombarded with demands. What's the difference whether we're chatting on the site or on a messaging app? The buttons and functionality are the same either way:

I've come to realize that online dating just isn't for me. I'm not regretting the time I spent on it, but I do know that I've learned a valuable lesson. I'm an old-school kind of person who prefers tried-and-true methods over the latest trends.

Thanks to everyone who's been a part of this journey. It's been an experience, that's for sure.