A Mixed Bag, But Worth Reading - Especially for Loved Ones

I picked up this book on psychology at a local bookstore for 385 rubles, and it's not about self-diagnosis. That's True for any medical book, not just psychology.

I bought it at a reasonable price, considering the content.

First impressions:

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline PersonalityThe publisher gets credit for the solid binding and decent paper quality - it's offset.Flip it over and check out the back cover for a quick rundown of the book. It'll give you a sense of whether you should even bother reading it:

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline PersonalityThe chapter count is pretty low, and I think they're too brief to do the material justice. Here are a few images from the book to give you an idea:

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline PersonalityOf course, when you're reading about borderline personality disorder, you'll probably think, "Oh, that's me." But the truth is, it's a complex set of symptoms, and the book breaks it down into 9 key criteria:

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline PersonalityIf you find yourself ticking five or more of these boxes, it might be worth talking to a psychiatrist to get a proper diagnosis.Living with BPD is no picnic, and neither is being related to someone who has it. Considering it can run in families, it's a whole mess of dysfunctional relationships and dependencies. The book is a mix of science and storytelling, and while it's engaging for non-experts, it's a treasure trove of information for professionals. It goes into the diagnosis, the causes, and the treatments (therapy and medication).

I hate you, but don't leave me. Borderline personalities and how to understand them. D. Kreisman, H. Straus Practically every chapter has stories from real life, and it's easier to understand how people with borderline personalities live. I hate you, but don't leave me. Borderline personalities and how to understand them. D. Kreisman, H. Straus Here's a collection of stories about various dependencies, depersonalization, antisocial behavior, and other problems that people with borderline personalities face. This book has a lot of advice on how to live with a borderline personality diagnosis, and it's really helpful for people with this diagnosis:

People with borderline personalities need to learn to let themselves have 'bad' feelings without judgment, blame, or denial.

The author claims that about 2/3 of patients who undergo treatment have a good chance of living a normal life. So, borderline personality isn't a death sentence.

I hate you, but don't leave me. Borderline personalities and how to understand them. D. Kreisman, H. Straus The author also claims that every case is unique and treatment should be tailored to each individual, there's no magic pill:

I hate you, but don't leave me. Borderline personalities and how to understand them. D. Kreisman, H. Straus People with borderline personalities are made up of contradictions, and this passage describes it perfectly: He's afraid of being alone and so he clings to people; he's afraid of being consumed and so he pushes them away. He craves closeness, but at the same time, he's afraid of it. It all ends with him pushing away the people he wants to get close to.

The theme of loneliness often comes up in the beginning of the book when describing the borderline personality diagnosis:

Patients oscillate between wanting a close relationship that would save them from emptiness and boredom, and the fear of closeness that they think would take away their confidence and independence.

And in these words, many people can see themselves:

Borderline personalities are constantly changing, like a kaleidoscope, piecing together fragments of their essence into new forms, each one different from the last, but still belonging to this personality. Like a chameleon, a person with borderline personality takes on any form that they think will please the observer.

This book is definitely worth paying attention to. I first read it in 2020, and I recently re-read it to update my knowledge. The first time I read it, I found a lot of insights that resonated with me, but the second time I read it, I gained a deeper understanding of the complexities of borderline personality disorder.

I loved that the book didn't just stop at explaining the diagnosis, but also gave practical advice on how to deal with people around you - including family members - who are living with PLP. Those tips were super helpful in understanding the emotional complexities of people with PLP.

The section on medication was a bit tough to read, but fortunately, the book didn't go into too much detail.

I'd give the book a solid 5 stars - I really enjoyed it and picked up some valuable insights for myself.

In 2020, I was so into the book that I even made my husband read it, and he said it helped him understand me better and know how to react when we have misunderstandings. That made me think... But honestly, I don't think I have PLP, and I wouldn't recommend it to you either - even if you think some of the things written might apply to you.

So, to sum it up, the book is interesting and I'd definitely recommend it. The cover is solid, the pages are well-printed, and the font is perfect for reading.