A Life-Changing Book That Changed My Perspective

I still remember the day my partner suggested I read Vadim Zeland's book. At first, I thought I got it. The author's voice was soothing, and his words drew me in. But then came the reflections, discussions, and arguments – it was all really interesting and engaging. That's when I realized the main point of the book: that overemphasizing the importance of something is what holds us back.

Overemphasizing importance blocks our progress. I was so deep into the book's message that my head was spinning. I was making progress, and for a while, I felt happier. Whenever I wanted something, I'd get it. The author also made a point that our surroundings and the people around us are what we are. But back then, that didn't resonate with me as much – I was more focused on achieving my goals.

But there were also negative consequences. I swung to the other extreme, trying to avoid overemphasizing importance. I started controlling my thoughts and soon felt like I'd lost the meaning of life. Now, I'm just a robot following a script, not thinking for myself.

That's when I decided to stop reading the book, or rather, forget everything I'd learned. As I later realized, I hadn't fully understood the book's message at the time.

But then, 2 years later, something shifted.

So, what happened? You know, it was just another ordinary day – I was sitting on the couch, watching TV, and eating. I wasn't thinking about anything, when suddenly, a thought popped into my head: 'What's my life like? What's in it?' And that's when I realized my life had become monotonous and unfulfilling. My thoughts were consumed by 'What's the point of living?' and 'What are my goals?'

Especially since I had many goals, but I wasn't doing anything to achieve them. As Zeland said:

'You are what surrounds you.'

That realization hit me hard, and I came to a new truth:

If you want to surround yourself with the right people, situations, and events, you need to change yourself first.

And in that moment, I remembered Zeland's book and saw it in a whole new light.

'Why focus on techniques if they don't improve your quality of life?'

The book is about improving your self-awareness and achieving your desires with the author's advice. Even if I apply his techniques in my own way, it'll be better for me. From that day on, I decided to change my life – completely and radically.

Now, I'd like to share my experience of how I applied this book to my life.

Keep in mind that what worked for me might not work for you. Think about what you want, not what society or others expect.

I'm glad we're continuing. My goal was to change myself, both physically and morally. As the saying goes, 'you are what you wear,' and to some extent, your inner self is reflected in your outer self.

So, my review will be a bit more general, and I want to share my experience of how my life has changed. In other words, the results I've seen and the ones my friends and family have noticed.

For me, improving my life (being the boss of my life) is way deeper than just getting healthier or making more money, finding love, and so on. It's all about improving the quality of my life.

How I started and where I began.

I approached this question globally – I opened up an Excel sheet, sat down, and started thinking about what I wanted, what I'd always wanted, and what I wasn't particularly fond of.

First and foremost, you associate yourself with your physical appearance and how you feel:

the quality of what we eat – proper nutrition (PN);and, of course, how we look, because our body is just a reflection of our inner love for ourselves – sports.I've already written about proper nutrition here, and about fitness here.

I created an Excel table where I listed out what I wanted to do each day, including fitness and PN. To ensure I wouldn't fall back into old habits, I marked off each day's accomplishments, and I also set up penalties for myself when I didn't meet my goals. Yeah, it might sound harsh, but what else can I do? People are naturally lazy, and they'd rather go to the gym than work out at home because it's easier and there's more control involved. Plus, a habit forms in at least 21 days.

Even Zeland says:

Your ego resists changing. You're used to living in a comfort zone.

I won't go into all the details of what I started doing each day, but I'll outline the main rules.

Of course, improving my life is about health, which means it's about getting a good night's sleep, quitting bad habits, going for daily walks, taking care of myself, and so on. But the external also needs to be supported by the internal. You could even say that's the most important part! The goal of Zeland's book is that you become the boss of your life, so start thinking and doing things differently.

So, for me, the internal is about knowledge, development, and positive thinking.

Now, let me explain that in more detail.

For example, there's something I really want, but I don't find the time or money for it. What do I do? First, I cut back on TV time or give it up completely, and I also reduce the time I spend on the internet. Yeah, I know, we love it. It's better to spend that time on something real or something useful. Second, if I don't have the money for what I want, I start saving up bit by bit. Of course, we can remember Zeland's phrase about letting go of importance. BUT! Without effort, even with the removal of importance, your desires won't just magically appear.

For me, hobbies have become dancing and cooking something delicious and healthy.

Now about the learning point. It's simple - you just bring into your life what will boost your knowledge level. Whether it's for work or just personal development. For me, it was learning English, watching YouTube tutorials, and improving my Excel skills. I also read literature related to my field.

Now about the personal growth point. Of course, that's reading, but not glossy magazines, newspapers, or negativity. Guys and girls, read more! You won't know your own speech later, you'll be well-versed in any topic. Psychology, business, economics, or whatever! Classic literature is the best. Nothing beats it.

And that's exactly what happened with me - I decided to dedicate a certain number of hours each week to reading. I read on the metro, at home before bed, and even on walks. The main thing is to have the desire!

Now about the positive thinking point. Think about how much time you spend just thinking about yourself, what's changed in you, why certain events are happening, and why you get angry. I know many people will respond with, 'Is it really necessary?'

Yes, it is. As you're your own best advisor, you're learning something new every day. Plus, we often shape our environment and lives with our thoughts. How often do we criticize ourselves, others, complain, get offended, and tolerate bad behavior from others? So, why don't we draw conclusions, look for reasons?

Learn to show love: instead of a scowl on the metro, smile; instead of criticism, find something good in someone; instead of judging, try to understand; instead of whining, take action. Learn to think positively. For example, I set aside specific days: love day, no criticism day, no dwelling on the past day, and so on. And yes, finally, learn to keep your promises! How much do we not value ourselves and others to just 'let empty words go to waste?'

Be the master of your life! If you try to think this way, you'll attract more positivity into your life.

As Zeland says:

We only find confirmation of our thoughts and beliefs in our lives. Change your beliefs, and your life will change!

Maybe someone won't understand why for me, the concept of 'master of your life' is such a long list.

But I'll try to explain:

'How can you be the master of your life if you're out of harmony within, when you're chasing physical things but forgetting about the inner? Life is harmony, love, and happiness!'

Results:

At first, it was very hard - I could say I forced myself to follow these rules. Plus, many people around me raised an eyebrow, and their phrases literally sounded like, 'What a weirdo! You can't do it, you'll burn out soon.'

It was tough to resist temptations, especially when my environment wasn't entirely supportive. Of course, now I don't do the entire list I mentioned, BUT many useful habits have stuck with me, and I don't know how I lived otherwise. I'm glad this book became a sort of 'wake-up call' for me. Yes, I can say I'm happy with myself:

I've finally achieved the body I've always wanted, and I'm happy with or without a drink. I don't feel the need to eat when I'm not hungry, and I don't find joy in food. I'm not looking for happiness in events or seeking validation from others. I'm a self-sufficient person, just like I envisioned 10 years ago at this age. I'm excited to live life and try to find joy in every day. Many desires that I couldn't even dream of a few years ago have already come True.

Let's break it down - the pros and cons of my experience:

For me, the first pro of following these rules is that I love having a fit and healthy body. Another important plus is that exercise reduces stress and improves my mood. Eating right and avoiding bad habits makes me feel healthier and more confident. But what I'm most proud of is becoming stronger physically and mentally. I've stopped relying on others' opinions, people, and situations. Maybe it's because I'm a person who loves to be a winner for myself.

However, there are a few things that didn't sit well with me. At first, I felt like I was limiting myself. It was tough to change my diet, and negative thoughts kept popping up in my head. I didn't see any changes right away, and my workout results weren't immediate. Secondly, my friends didn't always understand me. They'd try to impose their lifestyle or food choices on me, or even try to manipulate me into following their example. Most conversations would revolve around complaining about life or gossiping about someone else. The biggest con, or maybe even a pro for me, was that I lost interest in some of my friends. But that also led to new people entering my life, and I'm really grateful for that.

Occasionally, I'd feel like giving up and just relaxing, but now I can allow myself to do that because my good habits are already ingrained.

Would I recommend this book? Yes, but only to people with a normal mindset and those who can adapt these techniques to their own lives. Everyone is unique, after all.

Thanks for reading and paying attention!

I hope my experience can be helpful to someone. Feel free to share your thoughts or advice in the comments - I'd love to hear them.